Cookies are for kids – NOT women over 40!!
Sugar cookies are my favorite, and chocolate chips are a close second, although I like the actual cookie part more than the chips. However, I’m talking about a different kind of “cookie.” You know the ones – those little “things” that allow everyone to know your every online move in life. I don’t need Big Brother or every other company on God’s creation to track each and every click, because it is going to drive me insane or send me to an early grave. You know what really sucks the most about reaching and accepting your middle-age-ness? BEING F-ING REMINDED ABOUT IT EVERY F-ING SECOND OF EVERY F-ING DAY. I mean…let’s face it. You are. We ALL are. I’m reminded of it every morning when my puffy eyes slowly open…..when I feel the pain throbbing in my left knee and my neck as I try to literally WILL myself out of the bed. I look in the mirror, and I discover a new wrinkle that I SWEAR wasn’t there yesterday and I think “when did THAT happen?” All that in the first 10 minutes of every day. Amazing. And by the way, when anyone tells you that “age is just a number,” I’ll bet my life that the person saying that is always under 40!!
So, no thank-you people. I’m not really good with the level of age reminders, and I certainly don’t need more. The Gram (as the Gen Z’s call it…to the rest of us known as Instagram) is for posting pics & stories with me and my best-made face…at JUST the right angle….when JUST for a split second, I look like my young self again. Good Gram skills, along with being an expert with photo filters, are a middle-aged gal’s best friend. Let’s be honest. How many times do you begin to post a photo from the previous night’s event like your best friend’s wedding, and instead of finding the best photo of HER (the bride), you find the one where YOU look the best. As much as we tell ourselves that we want to post the “stories of our lives,” we do it with the most meticulous photo-editing you have ever seen. That’s not vanity. That’s truth.
Sidenote – if you ever post and tag me in a photo and I look like SHIT, you are dead to me.
Back to YOU Instagram….Facebook….and every other company that ingests, processes and does whatever with my data and serves me with every kind of “middle-age women products” on the planet. I DON’T need you to send me an ad for every single new uplifting bra or face cream, nor do I need to join AARP (although I do hear the discounts are amazing). I’ll never shop at Chico, J.Jill or any other Middle-Aged Dresses R Us store, nor do I need to find my inner middle-aged peace. I found it alright…..and there isn’t one thing peaceful about it – because here I am, writing about it with a vengeance. There’s not one bit of peace in this equation.
Ironically, that’s the beautiful thing. The simple idea of having our life half over forces most of us to take a long hard look at ourselves (and that look is HARD folks)…..and ask ourselves if we are really where we want to be. Some of us (myself included) didn’t even know how to answer that question. People often say “ya gotta dig deep.” My response has always been – I could dig that hole to China and back, and still not be able to find my true self. If I couldn’t find it, how in the world could I ask it if it’s fulfilled and happy?
A couple of years ago, I decided to allow myself to go on this little journey of self-discovery. It began involuntarily and has certainly had it’s ups and downs, but over time I was able to dig that hole and find Ginger. And you know what? I finally realized that my life wasn’t half over and was no longer questioning if I was where I needed to be. I realized that I was EXACTLY where I needed to be. I may not have had all of the answers, but I knew that I was ready to ask the questions. I would not be where I am now had I not gone through this process, even if the start was with me kicking, screaming and fighting it every step of the way until I surrendered.
Life itself if full of those ebbs and flows or peaks and valleys to coin a few more over-used phrases. I have learned to be grateful for them, because they are simply part of the journey. I don’t look at my life like it is half over. I now know that am so lucky that I still have half of my life to live. I now know that I have to do whatever it takes in both my personal and professional life to keep in touch with Ginger. She came a long way from China. She is my new BFF now, and we are ready to pass that shovel onto the next person who may need to “dig deep.” Thank you for the perfect words Justin Bieber – I DO like the way I look. I think I WILL just go and love myself.
